This Might Be Too Personal

February 21, 2022
Shelasky (Apron Anxiety), editor of New York magazine’s “Sex Diaries” column, chronicles her love life and writing career in this collection of blithe essays. Recounting her first job in “See Alyssa Date”—writing a blog of the same title for Glamour magazine—Shelasky knew “participating in such an uncool, heteronormative” project was (even in 2006) “wildly unwoke.” But it helped her find her calling: to be a writer who “share deeply personal stories as a way of exploring complicated universal truths.” Shelasky flies through almost two very busy decades: from growing her career to deciding to become a “Single Mom by Choice” via IVF to finding love outside “a traditional couple construct.” The writing achieves vitality around her pursuit of motherhood—recalling the fertility doctor’s visit in “Dr. Grifo,” she writes, “It was like, This is the moment I’ve waited my whole life for and This is the moment I never wanted to see happen both coming together at the exact same time.” Unfortunately, though Shelasky writes of resenting comparisons to Carrie Bradshaw, her rom-com-like zingers (“And just like that, my fatherless daughter had a dada”) get more play than the story of what actually drove her toward a life of “unconventionality.” Instead of being “too personal,” Shelasky’s essays elide as much as they illuminate.

Starred review from June 17, 2022

With candid humor and self-deprecating charm, columnist Shelasky (Apron Anxiety; New York magazine's "Sex Diaries") tells all in a collection of essays chronicling her love life from its spectacular early failures to its ultimate successes. The first half of the book follows her through one botched relationship after another, as she runs away from friends' weddings, her own wedding, even her very first book launch. She also details a sexual assault, which took place before #Me Too became a movement. Facing some hard truths, Shelasky finally stops running away from a life she dreads, and instead starts running towards the life she wants. After realizing she doesn't need a man in order to achieve her desire to be a mother, her life really starts to get interesting. When Shelasky is in charge of the narrative, it can never be too personal--and readers might even learn something, too. VERDICT A fun, laugh out loud, yet tender read for memoir-lovers and fans of Shelasky's work.--Venessa Hughes

Copyright 2022 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

April 1, 2022
Shelasky, editor of New York Magazine's Sex Diaries and author of Apron Anxiety (2012), continues to mine her personal life, insecurities, and bodily functions in her new book of essays (including gossipy New York asides). After detailing her many sexy-yet-failed relationships, and nearing her midthirties, Shelasky knows the one thing she really wants is to be a mom. She decides--regardless of the fact that she is continually hustling for work, including a frustrating stint trying to get a TV pilot--to try IVF via a sperm donor, taking control of her life in an utterly new way. Which of course leads to novel opportunities and a love interest at the most unexpected time. Shelasky relishes oversharing, which makes for many hilarious and heartfelt moments: you will feel like she is your new best friend. Her essays, while often heavy in subject matter, are short and conversational. This is perfect beach reading, and while Shelasky claims all those Carrie Bradshaw comparisons are unfounded, it's ideal for Sex and the City fans, too.

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